Dena Igusti "Wet Dream (Frank's Ocean)"

 PC: Lucci Mia  

PC: Lucci Mia  

All of my love poems are about Frank Ocean  
Not about him not writing an album for three years

and calling it loss
Not about him showing up only in features

and calling him fleeting,

but how Frank is a lovely man but

Ocean fills my lungs,
forces his words into my mouth,
makes me stutter and choke when he leaves

and doesn't come back
i'm always left waiting
i'm always left wading

This the second time this month. Frank and

i haven’t spoken in days
The last time, i told him his surface

pushes me away before it invites me in
and he kept me in the background like a video girl

 

i lay my head against the headboard
Frank comes in, unannounced
sits on the edge of my bed. Ocean follows afterwards,
makes way through the doorway

 

i can feel Ocean rise up around the room

All seven seas slosh
between the walls
between us
It ruins the carpet

It rises to our waists. We

don’t ask each other
who called the ocean over
his ego or my desperation


It rises to our necks
We are both about to drown
but we still won’t call out
to each other for help

 

Have you tried to fall in love with           a body of water?       How

his surface pushes you away      but       the rest of him

envelopes you, pulls you in until             you can’t breathe? How

all he does is soak up the sheets but      evaporates        by      morning?
How even when            he condenses onto your skin       you still want to cry because
he spills between         your fingers

 

left      you    dripping

Even if you were all jar with lid,         he'd

still manage to flow

                                     out

                                                          of                                                   you?

 

i go to his house to break it off
i tell him it's over

 

he just nods his head
 

i tell him i made the mistake
Of turning a man

into a deity
Curse him Poseidon

 

He stays silent

Our ending was just like his first name: ordinary, frank
 

i turn away                                                                 he does not grab my hand
i shut the door and                                                     it stays shut
i walk out of his apartment                                         he does not run after me,
but when i come home                                                my room is still covered in the water damage
of Ocean                                                                     the floors are fucked up
my shit is ruined                                                          the bed is still cold and wet
But his side is warm                                                     saltwater spills on my face
not because of the Ocean                                            it’s because of Frank